I passed away

Today, I am very far away. Maybe I passed away.

I can’t hear my voice. There is such noise.

My insides speak but I have woken with my system crashed. I can’t understand the grammar. The words shout out at me, they form shapes but the sounds seem to rise from lifetimes below.

The song drums on my ears… but I can’t smell its roses, its rivers, its rain, its dusks, and the handholding under tables.

The long list of ‘friends’ scrolls down my cell… But someone curdled it last night and now it reeks of acid. It reeks so much that my arms have begun to decay from the hugging.

This world in front of my car… it seems to brake a little too much, a little too often, a lot too soon.

The man at the red light seems to stare too much and I slay him in my mind.

The cop tells me of rules and I strangle him from under my sunglasses.

My brows gather too much skin.

My skin is falling dead. The blood it hides is turning cold.

My eyes are turning toxic.

My lips are thinning from the polite hassle, the Smile is the ever-rising Alien.

These days, I wake up to Rage in my mirror.

I wake up to barbed wires around my heart.
I wake up to dripping blood on my tongue.
I wake up to a swelling of suspicion.
I wake up to nothing.
I wake up nothing.

I feel no water through my hands.

I feel no grass under my feet.

I smell no mud in the garden.

I see no birds around my trees.
I don’t smell the mango as I shove its mouth into mine. And even as its pulp drips, scatters, and tickles my throat, I can’t taste the blessing. I only gulp oxygen and it never returns.

This world is not my planet.
This world laughs too loud.

This world laughs at no reason.
This world laughs too much.
This world laughs in madness…
...And I have lost my madness.

I am mad looking for it.

Today I am far away.
Maybe I passed away.

(You have to bear me… so that I can be born again).

Painting Courtesy: http://www.strangefamiliar.com/